I’m a bit embarrassed to share this, but I recently came across some old threads about me in an online forum. You know, those places where anonymity lets people say whatever they want. To put it mildly, they were not fans of mine. They called me the worst person on earth, claiming I’m dangerously toxic with my positivity, a scam artist who uses my body to make others feel bad about themselves so they’ll sign up for my retreats. Apparently, my online persona is the cringiest thing they’ve ever seen.
One person even shared a story about how I was supposedly very rude to her on a plane, proving how fake I am, even though I wasn’t even on that plane. Another claimed I screamed at festival staff, which again, never happened. A woman bragged about a text thread with her friends where they mock my videos. Some people nicknamed me “Tara Neigh” because they think I look like a horse (I can see the resemblance, but I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that). There were some guys who found me insufferable but said they’d still do me (ugh, gross). And then there are the folks who want to #freedaniel because they think my husband must have a terrible life being married to me.
I knew what I was getting into when I clicked on the thread, but I dove in headfirst. And, well, I let it get to me. But here’s the thing: I’m human. I know I shouldn’t have read it, but I did, and I regret it. I feel guilty for wasting so much time on it, and sad that people are wasting their time hating on me. Some of their words hit hard because those negative voices in your head can be pretty convincing.
I’m not sure why I’ve been encountering so much hate lately, but I do know that I’m just doing my best. I want to spread light with everything I do and create spaces where people can be themselves, whether they’re feeling like rainbows and unicorns or feeling like I do after reading all those horrible things about myself. Sharing this is part of that mission.
To the people who wrote those things and think they’ve gotten under my skin, well, congratulations. But I also hope you find something more fulfilling to spend your time on. Life is too short to dwell in negativity. To my supporters, thank you for your love and positivity. You remind me why I do what I do. We all have moments of doubt, but let’s try to lift each other up instead of tearing each other down.
We’re all just trying to find our way. Sometimes, we trip and fall into a puddle of online negativity. But that’s okay. We get up, wipe the mud off, and keep moving forward. So here’s to moving forward, spreading love, and living our best lives despite the haters. Thanks for listening cause dealing with bullying is tough, and it’s clear that I can’t help those who choose to troll. I know it’s a bit of an unrealistic dream, but I wish I could free them from their negativity. Alas, some things are beyond our control.
I’ve also come to understand that giving my energy to people who don’t want help is taking away from those who truly need it. This is a hard pill to swallow, but your support has given me the strength to start focusing on where my efforts can make a real difference.
I’m not sure if you remember, but I used to make videos of myself dancing to Phish, losing myself in the music and feeling pure joy. But the hate I received for those videos crept into my subconscious and I stopped. I wasn’t embarrassed about my dancing, but I felt ashamed that I let the negative comments get to me. The harsh words and cruel critiques chipped away at my confidence and silenced a part of me that was free and happy. It was hard to admit, even to myself, how much those comments affected me.
I started questioning my worth and doubting my passions. The joy I once felt turned into anxiety and self-doubt. It’s tough to look back and see how I let others’ opinions dictate my actions and rob me of something I loved. If you’ve ever stopped doing something you love because of mean comments or harsh judgments, know that you’re not alone. It’s a painful experience but it doesn’t define us.
Let’s reclaim our joy and passions. Dust off those dreams, and remember, haters gonna hate, but we’re gonna shine. Embrace what makes you happy and dance like no one’s watching. I hope no one resonates with this but if you do, I’m sending you so much love.
If you want to dance with me, here’s my Insta. @rockinglife__
Love you!
T
