Do I trigger you? Do you have a person you know who triggers you?
Does it piss you off when we post photos of traveling and having fun with friends?
Do you have feelings of anger or jealousy when we share what’s going well for us in our lives?
Do you start to feel bad about yourself and your life?
Is this blog post annoying you?
It’s ok. I have those feelings too. We all do because the thing is, we’re all spiritual beings having a human experience and as human beings we have egos and our egos sometimes get triggered. It’s how you react to the triggering that makes all the difference.
I’ve shared photos like this one on social media:
I have gotten comments like this…
“Don’t you work at all?”
“Must be nice to have your husband support you while you have fun frolicking all of the world.”
“What do you even do to have the money to travel to these places? You must be a drug smuggler or something.”
“You’re just lucky. I’m not.”
“Your life is so easy.”
“You must be independently wealthy.”
All of the above statements are projections people have put on me based on how they see my life and not reality.
For someone to take the time and write comments to me like this I am obviously triggering them. I totally get it. I’ve had thoughts like that when looking at other people’s pictures too.
The questions I ask myself when this happens to me is,
“Why am I feeling this way towards this person? What’s this REALLY about?”
Whatever it is that makes you angry or jealous about this person is what either you need to work on within yourself, is subconsciously linked to something that has happened to you in your life you are still holding onto to or it’s what is seeking to emerge out of you.
Let’s start a conversation here. Join the conversation at the bottom of this blog by sharing what triggers you, why you feel triggered and what actions you are going to take to release the trigger.
The awesome in me bows to the awesome in you.
Love and light,
This is a fucking awesome post, bringing it straight back to the 4 Agreements. Love it and I think you’re awesome. Your evolution is so fucking fantastic, Taraleigh. I couldn’t be more happy or proud of you. Keep killing it and love every second of Pure Vida. xoxoxo
Terra! I love you. Tara! I love you too. Great article. I remember our first conversation on this back in October. Always a good reminder to hear it again. We are all infinite beings!
Love you soul sisters! <3
oh man. I need to spend some TIME with you two <3
Taraleigh I appreciate the fact that you always bring things back to the positive. It is your way and possibly what is most unique about you. I would point out though that you seem to be focusing lately on what people think. I would say, “Who cares?” but, when people are posting things directly on your wall or in your comments it can be a little in your face. I get it. I would just say continue to focus on the positive and don’t spend too much time on the haters. At shows I hear all the time, “You have the best job every.” Well, let me just say I work very hard at my real job as a video producer to have the opportunity to go to concerts and take photos. And furthermore I know professional photogs and they bust their ass. So… yeah perceptions can often trump reality. Good luck as always in your journeys… and if you recall you may have triggered me once. I think that’s how we became friends.
Taraleigh, what an intriguing post and so very relevant in the age of social media! I msut say I often do compare myself to others when on FB, and I often feel sad and bad about myself when I look at people’s pages. I feel like their lives are so much more successful and fulfilled than mine. It doesn’t make me mad; it makes me sad. 🙁 Then I try to remind myself to not compare. And I must say I am so curious as to the heck writes those negative and belligerent comments on your page? Are they people you know? xo
P.S…Taraleigh, you too sometimes are triggered by other people’s posts? How do you handle that emotion?
I will say there are times that I am envious of your endless adventures because I yearn to do what you do. However my logistics are very different than yours and I understand that. I decided to raise children and that has a limiting factor. Although, I do make sure I have my time and fun and adventures….they are just shorter than yours currently are. Moreover it is my goal once they have graduated high school (7 years and counting) that I want to begin my adventures again, and in between my family and I will have a few of our own. It is perspective and the way you conduct your life and business. I know you work hard at what you do and have a business that allows this and don’t have certain responsibilities that deter your travel …there is nothing wrong than that. And if people need to post negative comments…just like I tell my daughters…that is their issue within themselves…certainly not yours
I always assumed you were a trust fund baby or lotto winner or something. And yes it’s because you seem to be doing whatever you want wherever you want. Same with the other faces I see at all the fests. That’s hard to pull off without money. But I never had ill feelings about it. I just figure, however these people pull it off, good for them. At least they don’t stay home and waste their money on material crap. People say the same about me. “I wish I was traveling around all the time and partying instead of working”. As if this isn’t my job. And I work a hell of a lot harder than they think. For the record, I’m glad you are at all of these places. I enjoy running into both of you.
As for this triggering business. I could be wrong. But maybe it’s your job to trigger people. So many people make huge life changing decisions based on being jealous of what others are doing. I know I did. Maybe when someone says “must be nice” you should consider it a service. Maybe they’re only one FB photo away from their own adventure.
I love your pictures of travels! I used to be that girl. In Mexico every month, going to Japan on a whim, cruises several times a year…. then I got married and had a baby. My baby was born sick and I wasn’t able to hold him for a few weeks. My trigger is seeing pictures of people happily holding their healthy newborns. I have those awful feelings of jealousy and anger when I should really be happy for my friends and acquaintances. I don’t make snide comments but I can hear them in my head and I cry every time. How awful it is that we can’t just feel joy for others because our own jealousy gets in the way.
I am not your target audience, I think, and I don’t think I’m triggered by you. But I have observed that people often do communicate with intent to trigger, often subconsciously.
I don’t care if you post expressive pictures of yourself at St.Croix. But you might ask yourself why you are doing it. We want to present ourselves in our own way and we want to be seen by others a certain way and have them react a certain way.
It is true that it makes no sense for you to own the projections other people put on you. That is their own affair. However, how you present yourself does influence what projections people will make. Do you care? Maybe not. But probably some part of you does or you wouldn’t be thinking about it at all.
In short, no you don’t set me off. Look, I understand where you’re coming from and what it is you’re trying to accomplish and at the end of the day, I say more power to you. While I could never afford to attend one of your exciting & rejuvenating retreats, there’s no doubt that they’re a ton of fun. You should find a lot of success and happiness since that’s clearly what you’re aiming for. Who cares if some haters hate and jelly ppl stay jelly. Ha. See you at jazz fest?